I am flattered that people ask. It’s a sign of trust. But for the last couple of years I have stopped providing referrals and here’s why.

I Got Burned
A client contact me with a new build. I was too busy to take it on. I referred it onto another developer. About 8-10 months later I had another email from the client, letting me know how unhappy he was with the developer I had sent him to. The site was unfinished and the developer was unresponsive. Guess who felt responsible? Guess who got to finish the site? Guess who got to do the IE6 compatibility and other not-fun nit-picky things that got left until last?

Yep.

Needless to say, I didn’t enjoy that experience. I realized how the project turns out post-referral reflected on me and yet I had no part in how the project progressed.

Everyone Wins But Me
There are three parties to the referring situation - the end client, the developer, and me. When I would provide the referral the developer got a nice project and the associated income - so they win. The client got their project done and enjoyed the business benefits that it should bring - so they win. Me? I spent time playing matchmaker. I took advantage of my years spent in the marketplace and building personal connections through a variety of situations - all in an effort to save the end client time vetting developers, and saving developers time vetting clients.

And my reward for that part in the process? Bupkus. It’s been all risk for no reward.

I’ve suggested charging. I’ve offered access to a mailing list for a fee. In the odd case I’ve gotten a small referral fee. But overall those ideas have not been well received. In lieu of a solution that rewards value for all parties involved I have been declining to provide referrals and instead pointing clients to resources like http://director-ee.com/ and letting them know they need to do their own vetting rather than rely on me.

But maybe I’m missing a better way. How do you handle referrals? Have you been similarly burned? Have you found a way to be rewarded for the service you are providing?

1. What candy featured prominently in EE’s early development?
2. What TV show did Rick Ellis do sound engineering on?
3. What town did current CTO Derek Jones recently move from?
4. What’s the name of that towns weekly newspaper?
5. What’s the longest variable name in EE (that you’ve probably never used)? 
6. Where did the first print ad for EE appear?
7. What character appeared in an EE2 easter egg? 
8. How is an easter egg triggered in EE1?
9. What was the name of a PHP-based, standalone quiz application written by Rick Ellis?
10. Who was the first EL employee?
11. What instrument does Rick Ellis play?
12. What type of band did Rick play in during the mid 80’s?
13. Who was the first Chief Evangelist?
14. Whose head appeared on a stick during a video by Derek Jones for EECI 2009?
15. What was the code name for the EE 2 beta?
16. What did the p in pMachine stand for? 
17. How many custom fields per weblog did pMachine have?
18. What was the purchase price of PmachinePro? 
19. Which recently deceased and long-troubled rock star had a site that ran on ExpressonEngine? 
20. What was Rick Ellis’s first job?
21. What 80’s hair band did Rick’s band share a recording label with?
22. What blogging tool inspired Rick to think about low-cost web publishing systems?
23. What was Rick doing for work when he created pMachine?

1. Skittles
2. Family Guy
3. Metropolis
4. The Metropolis Planet
5. {comment_entry_id_auto_path}
6. The SXSW magazine in 2008
7. A killer robot
8. A new entry with the title of “Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition” - and click preview
9. Quizzer
10. Chris Curtis - doing support
11. Guitar
12. Hair Band (really).
13. Kurt Deutscher
14. Ryan Irelan
15. Kaylee (after the Firefly character)
16. Publishing
17. Three
18. $45 for non-profit / $125 commercial
19. Michael Jackson
20. Working at a pizza place
21. Quiet Riot (Pasha records)
22. Greymatter
23. Audio Engineer

Happy Holidays from Boyink Interactive!

The sale will run until approximately 5:00PM Mountain Time.

Get it while it’s hot!

The information is currently lacking from the EECI website but we’ll be doing it in the same room as the Developers Track, Tuesday night from 7-8:00 PM.  You should have time to get your supper, hear our presentation, and still make it to the “reely big shoooew” planned for that night.

We’ll cover our first year on the road, why we did it, what the challenges were, and how it changed us permanently.  We’ll be available to answer any questions you might have around our full-time travel lifestyle (that includes teenagers).

Hope to see you there!

The one big issue that the non-homeschooling worlds loves to bring up (and homeschoolers quickly tire of hearing about) is socialization.  The fear is that by not being around 30 age-mates in a dedicated school building all day homeschooled kids will not develop what are seen as “necessary” social skills that traditionally-schooled kids will develop. 

The point of this post is not to debate that issue. If you are interested in how homeschoolers respond to “the socialization issue” in general you have Google at your fingertips and I wish you well on that.

The point of this post is rather how we as parents did note a deficiency in a particular set of skills in our kids, and what we’re doing to improve it.

Understand, our kids are both fine in social settings. They make new friends quickly and easily. They are able to play with kids both older and younger. They are able to be thrown into a new social setting and quickly get their bearings, come up with a plan, and take action on that plan.  For example, we were recently at a campground that was located across from a church. Sunday morning came and neither MsBoyink or I were feeling like attending. The kids, however, got themselves up, dressed, and on their own went over to the church where they worshipped, met people and had conversations that included telling our family story.

So what skills did we feel like we needed to improve upon? Critical thinking and group discussion. We noticed little things happening like one person breaking the eye contact between two others who were having a conversation. We realized larger issues - like we were not having many conversations of any depth. Our conversations were mostly around day-to-day things like eating, sleeping, and schoolwork scheduling. 

While at Greenfield Village, I read this sign about the Wright Family:

What would it take to have (roughly) the same thing said of our family?:

The Boyink family loved to learn.  They had a Kindle full of books from many different authors and thinkers, and they enjoyed sprited discussions and debates.

If that’s the goal, what steps would it take to start on a path leading to it?

If you want to get better at something, you start spending time hammering on the basics. Shooting freethrows. Running. Playing scales. We decided that if critical thinking and group conversations were similar skills, then a good starting point for improving them would simply be some practice times.  I usually dislike the word “intentional” but it covers what we did in this case; set aside a time, found a topic, emailed some links and agreed that we’d all read the articles and come ready to talk.

We struggled for a what to call this “conversational practice time”. We tried ‘pow-wow’. We tried ‘meeting’. Nothing really seemed to fit until somehow I ran across word ‘Salon’ on Wikipedia which has the following definition:

A salon is a gathering of people under the roof of an inspiring host, held partly to amuse one another and partly to refine taste and increase their knowledge of the participants through conversation. These gatherings often consciously followed Horace’s definition of the aims of poetry, “either to please or to educate” (“aut delectare aut prodesse est”). “

Perfect. We had started a ‘Family Salon’. We decided to rotate the choosing of a topic for a weekly conversation of indeterminate length (starting with low expectations of duration but hoping to build as we got better at it).  We initially thought we’d also have a special snack (something none of us had ever had before) or drink, but that’s proved too hard to coordinate.

So far our topics have been passion, courage, gratitude and hope.  We’ve listened to pertinent songs, read blog posts, articles, short stories, Bible verses and viewed clips from movies on YouTube.

The willingness to converse and share thoughts and feelings has improved. During our first Salon the kids said “it feels like we are in trouble”  - which was totally understandable because up to this point the only time we sat down as a family for serious conversation was when something wasn’t going well and we had to address it.  Our most recent Salon (on ‘passion’) lasted nearly two hours and the conversation ranged from the topic to future education plans to why we are traveling full-time to how we felt the trip had changed our relationships with another. 

In short, I declare the Family Salon to be a raging success in prompting deeper conversations with the our ever-maturing kids and (hopefully) setting us up for the same family epitaph as the Wright family.

I’m writing this from the perspective of being the email recipient, but most of this is universal. Pretend I’m that person you are emailing today. 

• Greeting/Introduction
  If you didn’t know me and walked up to me on the street you’d probably put your hand out and introduce yourself. Do the same in an email. Tell me who you are, what your company is, and where you are located. It gives me a sense of who is talking to me.
• Why You Chose to Email Me
  Where did you come across my name? Just randomly on the web? From the EE forums? A friend? And why me over the other folks you could have emailed? Not only does this help me know which of my marketing efforts is working, if you’ve been referred it allows me to seek out and thank that person.
• Signature
  Have a signature file with your name and contact info. Give me a way to check you out online to see if I think potential projects might be a good fit.
• Tone
  Friendly, self-deprecating emails get my attention and create an instant desire in me to want to respond quickly and helpfully.  Whine, demand, complain or abuse and I’ll just trash your email with no further response.
• Send a Thank You
  If you take only one thing away from this post make it this one: send thank you emails. “Thanks in advance” doesn’t cut it.  I’m saddened by the number of times I spent some time putting together a response and never heard a single word back. People don’t always respond in the way you want but send the “Thank You” anyway just for their time.  If you asked someone on the street for directions and they didn’t know the exact answer but made some effort to be helpful you’d (I hope anyway) say a quick “Thank You” before heading down the road.  Have the same courtesy with your professional interactions.
• Wait Until the Weekday
  More and more the web world seems to ignore weekends and I think that’s going to hurt us long term. We need downtime.  I’m guilty of weekend addiction myself, having my iPhone handy all the time to check email and Twitter.  Let’s help each other get back to the idea of weekends off and hold off on sending business-related emails over the weekends or after hours.  I’ll understand if you’re from a different timezone, but generally there’s no reason I should be getting business email on a Saturday night.

Let’s talk a bit about Twitter. I know Twitter is awesome for how quick and immediate it is, but it has its downsides as well.

• Proper Support Channels
  This is related to ExpressionEngine questions.  I love helping people learn EE and and am always humbled that people seek me out for it.  But please understand, if I’m not careful I can kill large chunks of time essentially providing free EE tech support. I’d much rather see you post first in the EE forums, then promote that thread on Twitter.  If I’m able to help I’ll follow the link and chime in, but if I can’t at least that way your request is in the formal system and available to others.  If your question is around the use of a 3rd party add-on then seeking out its support channel is best.  If you’ve already done that then link me to it so I know and don’t duplicate efforts already underway.
• Be You
  In general I’m uncomfortable having conversations with brands.  Use your corporate Twitter account for promotional tweets, but if you want to have a conversation step out from behind the logo. Use a personal account that has your picture.
• Wait Until the Weekday
  I know - people are on Twitter on the weekends so it seems really easy to hit them up. It’s like IM, right?  But again - I ask for help in keeping our weekends for personal and recreation time.  I might be working but if I am I’m probably under the gun to get some client work cranked out. Please wait to ask your questions until business hours.
• Say Thanks
  As I write this there is a question on Twitter that I’ve been tagged on.  I’ve responded to two questions from this person in the past without getting so much as a simple Thank You in return.  I have to say, I’m not inclined to respond again. Twitter may be a relatively new communications platform, but it’s still all about people.  Help me to feel valued and not just like an instant-answer monkey.

Poorly Written Email Example
I don’t want to get too carried away here but wanted to show an example of a poorly written email and a well-written email. We’ll start with the bad. This is the first email from this source, we’d never communicated in the past and this is the entire email:

Hi- I may have an assignment - pretty chilled - for a very nice client. We will need a partner to help build, and build out a CMS in EE.

We are very collaborative.

I can send your specs if this is something you are interested in bidding on.

My questions:

• Who are you?  There is no introduction or context.
• Why me?  There is no explanation of how you came to be sending me this email.
• What type of company are you?  First you say “I” and then you say “we”.
• What on earth does “pretty chilled” mean?
• What does “We are very collaborative” mean?  It seems really important the way it’s been called out but I haven’t a clue.
• The typos don’t instill a great sense of confidence.
• Lack of a signature doesn’t help. In this case I was able to look at the sending email domain and figure things out, but still.

Well Written Email Example
Again, this is the first email from this source and this is the entire email:

I’d like to see about bringing you in on a possible client project. I’ve seen your work, read your EE books, and reviewed your project guidelines. I think this is right up your alley.

As a quick overview, you and I would be working together to accomplish a complete design, content and back-end overhaul of (website deleted).

I would be responsible for the front-end design and initial HTML/CSS build (in close consultation with you along the way, of course). You would be responsible for EE architecture and implementation to take it from my static code to functional site. You and I both would interact directly with the client as well as each other, and would each be paid directly by the client. (I’ve worked with this client on print projects for a few years. Never had a problem getting paid, and they are generally pretty easy to work with.)

The design phase of the project would start in late March, with a goal to launch the completed site within 6 months.

I’ll be happy to provide a full site plan and content overview if you’re available and interested. The only urgent part of the job is getting them an estimate. They’re trying to get a budget approved and make a decision next week if at all possible.

Interested? Feel free to email or call me at xxx-xxx-xxxx (home office) or xxx-xxx-xxxx (cell) with any questions.

Best regards,

This is not a long email yet I already know why he chose to contact me, the nature of the project, the pay process, the schedule, what’s needed of me if interested, and alternate contact info.

Which feels like a professional communicator to you?  Which feels like a project that is going to go well and be successful for the end client? Which would you answer with greater urgency and interest?

Knowing that, why would you bother to write emails that didn’t inspire the same feelings in your recipients?

Remember the year?  Remember the decade?

I do, quite well.

The year was 2002. In addition to those events of significance there was also a much smaller decision, made in the living room of a small house in Holland, MI.

With a 3 and 5 year old scurrying about the house playing, with the security of a corporate job disintegrating at our feet, and with a insecure job market offering little in the way of options, together with my wife I decided to start a small business named Boyink Interactive.  I chose the name because I had no idea if I would be doing software/database or web development and I had already purchased the boyink.com domain name in earlier years (totally on a whim).

Every year around this time I write these posts, always feeling incredibly blessed and humbled that yet again, for another year, God’s chosen to allow us to continue to make a go of it.  Not only have I been able to provide for my family, I’ve gotten to do work I choose and love for people that are a pleasure to work with.  I get to follow whims that become additional businesses like Train-ee, and I get to choose to enter a period of full-time family travel while continuing to work.

It pleases me to no end to celebrate 10 years - a decade - in business as Boyink Interactive. 

Even if it is considered the “Tin Anniversary”..

But it’s not what you are thinking.

While I am getting more involved in the world of responsive web design with the goal of sites that adapt themselves to both the desktop and smaller-screened devices, that’s really not the topic of this announcement.

Rather, the Boyink family is no longer weighed down with the ownership of a stationary sticks-and-bricks house.  At approximately 11:30 AM ET on April 27th we tucked (shoved?) the last remaining possession from our house into our fifth-wheel trailer, climbed in the truck, and pulled out of the driveway that we had called home for 16 years.

We drove all of 5 miles to a local campground and setup home for a month, giving our boy time to take Drivers Ed and giving us time to finalize the stationary-to-mobile transition.

You can read more about the personal side of our world at our family adventure blog, where we’ll keep adding to the content we posted during the year-long RV road-trip that got us started down this path.

What about the business side?

Mostly?  Business as usual. 

My preferred mode of communication has always been email, and only a small percentage of my projects are with local clients.  Even with those clients face-to-face meetings are rare. I even found that our mobility allowed me to meet existing clients in person that I never had before - so I’m not worried that this transition will distance us from work.

I’m also hoping to be able to attend more Barcamps, Startup Weekends, Meetups, and regional conferences as we travel and that those experiences would connect us to people and locations in ways not possible being stationary.

We’ve no definite plans for where we’ll go (being able to decide such things last minute or on-the-fly is a great advantage of this lifestyle) but my hope is that we’ll see more of the US and then do some travel outside the US (but have no idea where or how quite yet).

If we end up somewhere close to you be sure to shout out - we love meeting up with others and sharing a beer or coffee!

This is part of our master plan to become fully mobile, ideally by mid-May.  I’ve posted the details of the house including photos and price on our Adventure Site.

No, we don’t know where we’re going once back on the road.  Yet, anyway.  Too much to think about between now and then!

This one practically fell together with the automotive “A” arms being natural legs and in perfect proportion to the coil spring body.  The ears & face platform are most of a small garden tiller (I just had to unbolt 4 blades and bolt two of them back on to get the ears going in the right direction).  The face is part pressure regulator of some sort and the end of a garden trowel blade.

It’s fun to see a friendly looking creation come out after the mean cat! ;)